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Sunday 26 February 2012

[wanita-muslimah] Niqab in Daycare

 

Pengalaman seorang wartawati Kanada yang menitipkan anaknya di sebuah Daycare
yang dikelola para muslimah berniqab.

http://www.montrealgazette.com/what+daughter+afraid/6190977/story.html#ixzz1nVR7AZ3N

'What if my daughter is afraid of her?'

I used to glare at niqab-wearing women on the street, but then I
opened my heart and mind - to a wonderful daycare provider

BY JENN HARDY, FREELANCE FEBRUARY 22, 2012

Women who wear the niqab usually remove it when no men are present, as
was the case at the daycare.

Photograph by: PHIL NOBLE REUTERS, Freelance

Not too long ago, if I saw a woman walking down the street with her
face covered by a niqab, I would feel it was my duty to glare. As a
non-religious feminist, I had decided that a woman who covers her face
is oppressed - that she is uneducated, and that her husband is making
her cover up because he's crazy and/or jealous.

OK, I'm exaggerating a little, but you get the point.

And yet until two months ago, I didn't even really know a single
Muslim. I went to high school in an Ottawa suburb, where I was
baptized a Catholic so that I could qualify for schooling in the
Catholic school system, which was considered better than the more open
public system.

We had one year of religious education that gave us a glimpse of world
religions. But I'm pretty sure my education about Islam came mainly
from CNN, or Fox. I went to university in a small town in Ontario. I
didn't meet any Muslims there, either.

My real education about Islam came very recently, courtesy of a
Montreal daycare.

Last December, I was seeking daycare for my daughter. At only 10
months old, she was still very dependent on her parents, and we wanted
to find a place that would nurture her - rock her to sleep if need be,
warm up my expressed breast milk and even be open to using our cloth
diapers.

I punched our address into the magarderie.ca database, and the first
one that came up was a 30-second walk from where we would be moving in
a matter of weeks. The daycare provider, Sophie, had outlined her
views on discipline, praise, healthy foods and the child-centred
approach of Montessori. She was someone I felt I could get along with.

I phoned her and we talked for an hour, laughing and chatting and
eventually deciding on a time to meet. She shared a great many of the
values that my partner and I do. She was also highly educated, trained
as a civil engineer.

Before we said goodbye, she added, "Oh, just so you know, I'm Muslim."

I said I didn't care, because I didn't.

She assured me that her daycare didn't teach religion. Cool.

But then she told me that when she's in public, she covers her face.

She said the last time she didn't warn a family over the phone that
she wears the niqab, they walked into the meeting and then walked
straight out.

I said I didn't care, but when we got off the phone, I realized I did
care. The first thing I thought was, "What if my daughter is afraid of
her?"

My family drove over to meet Sophie, her husband and son.

She came to the door, dressed in black from head to toe.

It was the first time I had been in the same room as a woman wearing the niqab.

I felt nervous. But my daughter didn't flinch.

The daycare was cozy; most of the toys were made of natural materials.
There were lots of books, a reading corner and a birdwatching area.
Books on Montessori activities lined the shelves. Nothing was
battery-operated; there was no television.

It was perfect.

We spoke for a bit, all together in the room before Sophie's husband
put a hand on my fiancé's back and they went downstairs to see the
other half of the daycare. Once the guys left, Sophie took off the
niqab.

I could feel my heart and my mind open at that very moment.

My daughter has been going to this daycare for more than two months
now, and we are very happy with the care she is given.

When they are inside with the children, the daycare providers (the
majority of whom are Muslim) are mostly dressed in plain clothes -
jeans and a sweater, long hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. These
women do not cover their faces in the presence of children, women or
close family.

My daughter isn't afraid of any of the women who take care of her,
whether they have their faces covered or not. On the contrary, she
reaches out to them for a hug every morning. To my daughter, the women
who work at the daycare are simply the women who hold her when she's
sad, wipe blueberries off her face, clean her snotty nose and change
her cloth diapers.

My daughter isn't growing up with the same ideas about Muslim women that I did.

I'm glad she's learning something in daycare.

So am I.

JENN HARDY is a freelance journalist and blogger who challenges
mainstream parenting at mamanaturale.ca.

© Copyright (c) The Montreal Gazette

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